Homa Bay fathers challenge tradition, take up childcare to deepen family ties

In a quiet but powerful shift in social norms, fathers in the area are embracing hands-on parenting. A role that some in the community once dismissed as “kukaliwa na mwanamke”, loosely translated as being ruled by a woman, is now being redefined as an act of strength, love, and responsibility.

Residents admit that, at first, seeing men bathe their babies or carry them to clinic appointments felt unusual. Today, however, many fathers are stepping into these duties with pride and purpose.

Jasper Opiyo, a father of three, says being actively involved in his children’s lives has transformed not only his perspective on parenting but also his relationship with his family.

“Taking care of my children has taught me what they truly need,” Opiyo explains. “I now understand the kind of meals they require from birth and how to support their growth.”

Beyond daily caregiving, Opiyo uses his time at home to nurture his children’s creativity. Unable to afford expensive toys, he builds handmade ones instead.

“When I am with my children, I make toys for them. These help expand their thinking and imagination when they play,” he says.

For Opiyo, fatherhood has also strengthened his marriage.

“We used to disagree frequently over house chores and babysitting,” he recalls. “But since I took up more responsibility at home, there is more understanding and love in our family. Babysitting has brought peace because my wife is no longer overwhelmed.”

His experience reflects a broader message being championed by Felix Odhiambo, a professional trainer who works with men on positive parenting skills.

Odhiambo emphasises that early parental involvement, from both mother and father, plays a critical role in a child’s development.

“When children are close to both parents in their early years, their cognitive development, physical growth, language skills, and social interactions improve significantly,” Odhiambo explains.

Mary Achieng’, an officer with ChildFund, echoes this sentiment. She notes that when fathers spend quality time with their children, it strengthens emotional bonds and creates an environment where both parents and children understand each other better.

What is unfolding in Ndhiwa is more than a change in household duties; it is a quiet social transformation.

As fathers swap fishing nets for baby bottles after a long day on the lake, they are challenging stereotypes, strengthening families, and redefining what it means to be a man in their community.