JAMILA'S MEMO: What is happening to humanity? Observations from a Kirinyaga home for the elderly

In Islam, we are told about an occasion when someone asked our Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him), a question. He asked him, who is most deserving of my kindness? and the Prophet said your mother, again your mother, again your mother, then your father, then your nearest relatives…

I say this because of a heartrending story we ran earlier this week about a home for the elderly in Kirinyaga County.

Some 39 women call the St. Mary’s Village Home for the aged their permanent address.

This is their life now because they have no relatives. They do but it is sad that at this age they are not surrounded by their family members, but strangers who have become family. These strangers take care of them, give them food, safety and company.

Among them is 85-year-old Salome Muthoni who claims she came to the home after mistreatment at the hands of her relatives.

“Tofauti na hapa watu wa nyumbani hapana penda mimi na mimi sina mguu hakuna mtu wa kukungoja nikaona hawa watu wananisumbua sana nikaangalia hapa iko mahali ya kuangalia watu," Muthoni told Citizen Digital.

It’s a story told by several women at the home, who claim they were neglected by their relatives and have found a place where they are welcome, cared for and have friends.

What’s more interesting is that there is a waiting list a mile long, for those who want to bring their elderly here.

“Siku hizi sana katika familia negligence imeingilia kwa sababu watu wamehama nyumbani wameenda mijini kuna ile inatumika sana kama mila kwamba mtu hataki kusumbuliwa unaona kuosha mama, kumpatia chakula kila siku tunaona ni kama tunasumbuliwa," said Fr. Michael Mutinda who is in charge of the home.

Kusumbuliwa…that’s what our elderly parents and grandparents have become..wanaotusumbua. They have become a burden  and are forced to look for affection and care at the hands of people who are basically strangers.

As a society we are slowly forgetting our culture and roots, the value of a parent, the respect we should show, the love and care that we should give especially when they need us the most.

Leaving the village and making a life in the city does not mean forgetting our wazee. Their prayers and wishes matter; whether good and the bad bora baraka kuliko laana.

But when we abandon them, maybe because they developed medical challenges or have simply become a bother, we are forgetting a saying that malipo ni papa hapa duniani..umri utakuja tu na utakupata hata wewe.

If the Almighty wills it, we will live to a ripe old age and all of us would want to be cared for by our relatives.

But when many of us get caught up in our daily lives and forget those important individuals, we are slowly losing our humanity.

In Kenya, we have about 3 million elderly people, some of whom are happily living among their relatives, but they are those who long to see those relatives, but are unable to.

We should never ever make the elderly feel like they are a burden. Instead, we should be collecting their blessings and wisdom and pray for a good ending for them and for us; it African. it is Christian, it is Muslim and it is just human and that is my memo.