MUNDE: The glamourisation of pregnancy and motherhood

For avoidance of doubt, I am not against people celebrating (and sharing) the pregnancy and motherhood journey. It's an awesome one and I celebrate with other mothers and fathers.

Facebook and Instagram can testify to that because the algorithm used to determine what kind of content appears on my feed always makes sure it is filled with baby and mommy content.

I support women who go all out to arrange an elaborate maternity photo shoot and baby shower (or several); those who make elaborate plans for their baby’s first birthday party and family photo shoot, or the one who want to capture those first few weeks of their baby’s life during a photo shoot with cute props and hours of trying to get the perfect shot with a baby whose head and neck are still very delicate. I am all for it.

What I do find insincere is those who try to paint a perfect picture of pregnancy and motherhood. No matter how wonderful the journey is, it’s not perfect.

There’s this trend whereby people talk of having ‘two under two’. Child spacing is a personal decision and as much as it’s true that there are women who want to ‘get over and done’ with giving birth fast, it’s not very true that having a small space between children is an easy thing like some try to portray online. If it’s very easy, the reality is that that parent might just not be very present in their child’s life - think nanny.

I’ve seen people on social media talking about having a one year gap between children and then going on to put captions like: “no shooting blanks here”, or  “so fertile” and the like. Socialites, social media influencers and celebrities like to say that you should not make them your role model ie if you see them doing something you disapprove of, swipe left and let them be rather than trying to play judge. 

Mine is just a commentary. No judgement. After all, live and let live.

This is a point of caution to those who tend to follow and believe everything they see on social media - don’t. There are many who glamourise pregnancy, childbirth and motherhood.

Some put outright lies.

If you want to have a small space between your children, do it because that’s what you want, not because you have been spending a lot of time on social media and it seems “everyone” is pregnant with number one, two, three or whichever number it is back to back.

Also remember there are many influencers and celebrities whose children are a cash cow because brands jump on the opportunity to work with them right from when they are expecting - supplements, maternity wear, skin products, to when they give birth - hospitals, insurance companies, to the motherhood journey - diapers, other baby items, schools and other things.

You on the other hand as an ordinary Jane might have to depend on your life savings to raise your child, so cut your coat according to your cloth.

Pregnancy, motherhood and babies are among the best experiences in life, but don’t be tempted to “pop” babies without planning, unless of course, your contraception fails you.